Communication

"Keep the lines of communication open."

That admonition was popular several years ago, and it still shows up from time to time. What does it mean? I certainly don't know, and I doubt that anyone else does.

Does it mean that talking is the way to solve problems, prevent problems, what?

Is it a metaphorical statement liking talking with each other to a telegraph line? Is it about always being ready to listen, as in staying off the phone, ready to answer if someone tries to contact you?

Used to be that talk therapy was the way to fix any emotional problem, talk about it and it would eventually solve itself. Unfortunately, that doesn't work, at least it doesn't work a lot of the time. Insight doesn't necessarily arrive with talking about something, and worse, insight does not necessarily cause change to happen.

We now have more and better choices than just "talking about it."

And, what is meant by "communication?" That's a very broad subject. It's communicating when someone gets pulled over by a policeman for speeding. It's also communicating when one has to pay the fine.

So, I say, ignore the trite advice to "keep the lines of communication open," and, instead, discover the information processing style preferences of whoever you want to communicate with. If you do, you'll find it much easier to get what you want, explain what you mean, and understand how the other person is receiving what you've said.

The meaning is the meaning received, not the meaning sent.

What that means is that it doesn't matter very much what you intended to say, were trying to say, if the person listening perceives it otherwise. You have to speak their language for the message you intend to be received without distortion.